i mustn't run away.
i mustn't run away.
i mustn't run away.
escapism. it's bad (big surprise.) a coping mechanism wholly unprepared to be stretched to such big feelings that most who employ it have. completely inadequate and unable to truly take us away from pain. because you can never really run. your conscious knows, deep down, you did something wrong. you caused pain. you want to just forget - but you never will. to keep running is to keep up the chase. you'll never rest. you'll never feel at peace.
it's easy to think of pain as being in one place, one environment, one person. if i just, get out of here, it'll be okay, right? this is less of a genius plan to leave the ones who loved you with less pain in the end, and more like leaving a wake which you do nothing to take care of. it's cowardly. and you won't escape. you can never escape.
pain must be fully, unabashedly faced with no cowardice before you can heal. nothing else works. ignorance is not bliss. replacement will never bring joy.
look into the eyeball of your boyfriend